And so, the last day of school ended. The fact that my routine is now changed feels weird. No matter how much we claim we hate school, the fact that it preoccupies our time is something we feel grateful for. We don't need to think about what to do, what to wear etc, and we can feel heartened by the knowledge that we are absorbing some knowledge, so our time is spent more usefully (right?)

Everyone around me is telling me how much they miss their class etc but I've yet to feel the sense of loss and emptiness. Maybe it's just late huh, probably feel it at the end of class chalet or something!

This year was a happier year for me (: At least I didn't need to think about how sucky my grades are and bla. -smiley faces everywhere!-

My stomach (abs in coach's context) hurts like TOOT. Can't laugh cos it'll be too unbearable.
Sound kinda coherent now.
Training tomorrow!

And why is my face flaking :/


Was talking just now and realised there are so many things around us which we easily neglect and take them for granted. I think it's times like this when you have nothing much to do except slacking and stoning and enjoying life, that you take a look around you and begin to be more conscious of your surroundings. increased self-awareness (: Something I seriously lack. It's as if I'm living in a cocoon, oblivious to everything happening around me.

Missed training today for the environmental thing. After the entire briefing, I felt really exhausted, even though there wasn't much for me to do. immense regret!
AND SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK I'm annoyed with her okay. I hate it when people just POOSH! disappear into mid air and just shirk all their responsibilities. Then I've to clean shit and try to piece things back together. Then miraculously in this increasingly interconnected world (see what LA did to me), there is NO WAY to contact her by calling/texting. SCREW it bloody hell, tell me right in my face that you don't wanna do it la. I know I don't reply to texts sometimes, but isn't it basic courtesy to reply ONCE.
But on a brighter note, I'll gain more experience and who knows, I might find some fun in this. Though I seriously cannot imagine how much fun I can get strutting in heels.

Overdue pix. went out with Qi and Stal that day.



Feeling a lil bored and sianed nowadays. Wish my life had some excitement, but I guess when I start working things will get busy!
Read this online and I found it really amusing. Why are there always people in this world who will manage to stand out?

Taiwan Woman marries herself
TAIPEI - Chen Wei-yih has posed for a set of photos in a flowing white dress, enlisted a wedding planner and rented a banquet hall for a marriage celebration with 30 friends.

But there is no groom. Chen will marry herself.

Uninspired by the men she’s met but facing social pressure to get married, the 30-year-old Taipei office worker will hold the reception next month in honour of just one person.

“Age thirty is a prime period for me. My work and experience are in good shape, but I haven’t found a partner, so what can I do?” Chen said.

“It’s not that I’m anti-marriage. I just hope that I can express a different idea within the bounds of a tradition.”

Her T$50,000 ($5,675) wedding comes after online publicity that has netted 1,800 largely sympathetic comments.

“I think there will be more and more girls like this,” said “divagirl,” who did not elaborate.

Taiwanese women are marrying later and less often as their economic status advances, fuelling government concerns about a drop in the birth rate and its impact on productivity.

Only 40 percent of women surveyed earlier this year by the education ministry said they imagined married people could live better than singles, local media said.

“I was just hoping that more people would love themselves,” said Chen, who will go on a solo honeymoon to Australia.

Chen said her mother had insisted on a groom at first but later jumped aboard the solo marriage plan.

But as Chen cannot officially register a marriage to herself, if she finds a man later she will wed again.

“If I had a steady boyfriend, I wouldn’t do this,” Chen said. “it would be offensive to him, anyway.”

The only way to react is, WTF.
Even though I am adamant on not marrying, I think THAT is desperate. who cares if you're single or left on the shelf for hell long, just stay true to yourself right. HAHA but my eyes really turned bigger when I read the headlines. Don't know if I should laugh or cry at her foolishness!

Gonna go take a bath already. found some interesting videos to watch later on. It feels good when I know what I wanna do instead of just browsing through videos and start doing lame stuff like surfing facebook. Feels so much like a stalker somehow. i can never stay on someone's profile for more than 2 minutes, cos it just feels weird.


Yesterday was a lazy, sticky, itchy day!
Lazy cos we spent the entire afternoon slacking on Rachel's bed. Sticky cos in the late night it felt uncomfortable cos I was feeling full and hot. Itchy cos something kept going up and down my legs, arms and back -AHEM-
But it was fun slacking hahah

I need cash right now. AGH.
Was tagged in an AYC pic not long ago and it brought back many memories. Like how fast time had passed and soon we'll be embarking on a new phrase of our lives.



I'm at a loss of what to do these days.
Shall go chiong a drama.

The rain smells nice, peppered with the tingling smell of my granny's cooking - life's awesome.
Yoga in the afternoon, FINALLY, in 2-3 months?! let's hope I still can walk normally tomorrow and not act as if I had abrasion between my inner thighs aha.


EOYS ARE OVER!

lagged after 5 days? Yups definitely. Cos I've been preoccupied with watching shows and playing ball and doing a whole lot of things which aren't noteworthy. To think I had a whole list of things which I wanted to complete in mind!

The last paper went fine, but the prep talk screwed my mood up. I totally DID NOT need them to remind me of how screwed my sense of self-discipline and how I needed to buckle up and improve the ways I psycho myself.
Close friends would know how I deceive myself sometimes. That's if you see it in the negative light. You can definitely call it encouragement, or self-motivation if you want to sometimes (:

Played a bit of ball and got my shots back. Feels really good when the ball goes in the direction you wanna!

Sunday was a day out with Mum after having breakfast with my family. It's these small little moments together which make me realise how much time we actually bond.
Most of the times, I'll just cope myself in my room, spending time on the com, mugging (?), doing a whole lot of things

Mid-Autumn Festival was the most memorable time I had with them. Part of it was cos it was during EOYS.. I've this notion that during EOYs, your expectations of fun are degraded. Little things make you feel happy.
But of course, I haven't been celebrating Mid Autumn Festival for quite long.


We wanted to ease the jobs of the cleaners, so we played on cardboard. And due to the limited number of candles we had (which were collected from birthday celebrations), we had a pathetic limitation of what we could do with them. It was also because my dad didn't even tell us beforehand! He just came home and asked if we wanted to go downstairs and do moongazing, with some tea and mooncakes. lmao.

It wasn't romantic like what you'd expect. A strong breeze, rivers shimmering under the moon light, trees swaying..... NOPES, nothing like that.
Played at some small badminton court and the moon was kinda pathetic-looking because we could only see its fullness between two TALL HDB flats. =.=
If we shifted away from our spot, the moon will be gone!
Just like that


Went to shop with Crystal and Jiaqi last Saturday. Walked around like some lost lil kids, and my feet hurt.
It was fun anyway (: Though i didn't buy anything. Pix up soon when Qi decides to upload them.

Went to swim with Crystal just now. Swam only 4 laps and decided to slack my ass off in the pool, observing little kids taking swimming lessons. I might sound like a pedo, but they're reallyyyy cutteee.
Reminded me of the times when I took swimming lessons when I was really young. I was the unlucky one to be in the class full of secondary school kids, and those big boys at that time, didn't even bother treating me nicely since I was just p1. Bloody hell, I'll boil at the thought. Still remember being kicked right in the face and it was effing painful. But it was precisely because I was the slowest in the class and the disparity was really appalling that I pushed myself even further, not wanting the gap to widen.

Gonna end here cos I gonna go to Bugis Library before meeting Crystal again after she met her nutritionist.

Tomorrow's school. again.



I can't possibly just have a post with pix.
Anyway it was fun yesterday, walking around aimlessly.
Plus, got my bro's wallet! Long belated birthday present ahaha










Woke up really naturally this morning, and it felt.... nice
At least I'll feel reassured that I had a good night's sleep and wouldn't need to deal with sleepiness or brain freezes in the middle of the exam. The quality of my sleep/nap affects my mood hell lot.

5th Oct: Yesterday was History. Today is EMath. Tomorrow is Chem
Yesterday was History. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today was a Gift - Ivan Mimic

6th Oct: Yesterday was EMath. Today is Chem Tomorrow is PHysics.

It never fails to amaze me how fast time pass by. I still remember a month ago on this very day, I was questioning myself how I would prepare for the coming EOYs and how the hell I would survive this period where everything would undergo a drastic change.
No bball - Not much com - No Yoga - No slacking

slacking with a constant nagging worry at the back of your head isn't exactly slacking.
Although I can't wait for everything to be over, I don't exactly want it to end.
Life's kinda fine with EOYs somehow. I think I'm used to it. School ends quickly, I like studying independently.....
And if EOYs were to be over, I've to deal with the anticipation of getting back the grades. And hell isn't exactly over cos there's O level Chinese. BLAH.

But on a brighter note, there's training and bball [kinda meant the same thing] and swimming and yoga and doing a list of hell lot of stuff I love to do.
Qi and I sidetracked an hour yesterday to talk about bball -.-
of all times.

I used to think
I had the answers to everything,
But now I know
Life doesn't always go my way, yeah...
Feels like I'm caught in the middle
That's when I realize...
-Britney Spears (I'm not a girl, Not Yet a Woman)

It has been quite long since she came up with songs like this. The less crappy kind unlike those which will pass along with time, forsaken with memories.
my Itunes library is getting crappier damnit. used to spam all the songs before listening to them, so I think I've near 200 songs that I haven't listened. 3.1k songs, 14.52 GB, how many do you actually like?

Time to shut the com and get ready for Math. I've been working really hard for this subject cos it's one of my few favourite subjects I'm really passionate about. They say with passion or interest comes results and grades. Let's hope I can prove that right.


1 down, 3 more to go


I can't figure myself, and probably never will.
People cry to reduce their misery or release their pent-up frustrations. Me? I cry when I'm disappointed.
Hell, as if my eye bags were not big enough.
Cried shit lot today though no one will understand why.

Saw this tweet on twitter.
Smiling is always easier than explaining why you're sad

Makes so much sense and after reading all her tweets, I actually felt better. I guess it feels good to know that there is someone out there going through a life which is probably 10x worse than yours. Call it mockery, self-deception, being disillusioned, whatever. My mind has been going through a rollercoaster ride ever since I've been trying to figure out the best way to have self-control this morning.

Today was kinda a waste since I only managed to finish what I was supposed to complete THIS MORNING. Damn. I'm behaving as if eoys are already over, napping here and there!

Yesterday was great though. Attempted a few shots, sweated it out. The feeling of adrenaline.... awesome.
So 5 papers down, how many more to go?? 5? I'm feeling kind of lucky being in the first few rows so I don't shiverrrrrr much or get a brain freeze.

Feeling really numb these days. No anticipation for anything. Knowing that the paper was probably screwed up but I really don't feel anything. It's definitely a good thing since I won't have panic attacks, but I"m really questioning my ability to feel.
Maybe I was born to be cold-hearted. or maybe it was pure selfishness so no one will see the other side of me I never wanted to portray.

Bloody hell what am I doing.
Gonna go off to do some work. And hopefully catch some teevee. And complete the things I should have completed in the afternoon in like what, 3 hours?