Just came back from school and it was dark at night. kind of cool, come to think of it.
I was telling qi how great it would be if I can stay like till 9 in school then take a bus home myself and stuffs. ah, my dad fetched me(: I'm not a spoilt kid who depends on their parents heh, just that he thinks I would reach home earlier anyway.
And I think I gonna appreciate the times when he can fetch me, cos I know I'll distance away somehow some years later.

Chinese New Year's over. Haven't really opened the ang paos but I don't really care since they go into my bank account and I can't even touch it. Chinese New Year was kind of nice, seeing relatives which I rarely saw, and telling myself once again that it's a brand new year, in the chinese way.
When many of the relatives said that I was TALLER and older, (and with more pimples lol), I thought: kind of true, and I'm like 15 already, wow...

I'm ageing. ah.

Steamboat was nice as usual, and we had barbecued chicken wings mixed with lemon sauce. Lou Hei was weird cos it was too sweet and the gingery taste was too strong. Food was nice, as usual(:


I feel tired. I don't even know the reason. I hardly did anything today. Ok, mugging with comint was kind of fruitful. At least I studied a teeny weeny bit, but we were saying how stupid and nerdy we looked cos Jacky and friends were celebrating his birthday. It's so cool when birthdays are remembered(:
I wonder why I'm uptight about my studies this year. I guess I really wanna succeed, for once.

I'M TIRED. Gosh I need someone to crap with me. Nobody chattable with online too. ha, let's just say I don't even add people zzz.


When hard work doesn't pay off
when routines don't carry out their meaning
when attitudes gonna change
when it's all ending


可我不曾见过海洋
我以为的遗忘
原来躺在你手上
我努力微笑坚强
I wondered if I mentioned this before, but 残酷月光 by 林宥嘉 just grabs my attention.

Today was quite ok. Lessons as usual, nothing special, except for the fact that we had mountains of homework over the "LONG WEEKEND". We are Chinese, so naturally we celebrate chinese new year, so the teachers can't possibly be hoping that we bring our homework to visit our relatives, can they?
That's madness.
And it's sort-of inauspicious, if anybody were to believe it.

But I believe in my mugging power so I shall complete it someday, sometime. However, I gonna certainly enjoy my chinese new year and gamble more.
To earn more pocket money. Cos I'm a poor child who's relatively deprived.

Third lang today was hell. Bused, trained and walked there with juniors. Ha, they're cute and can really come up with lots of crap. Hell, I didn't think I could talk so much and so carefreely when I was just one year younger.
The lesson was horrible because the teacher was speaking like a bullet train. In french. As if I understood. SIAO.
The worst thing was, I began dozing off. Tried pinching myself but it didn't work. Then I just jerked awoke like suddenly.
Chatted with a few RGS people and there was this girl who was super good in French.

Went to Popular to buy a notebook and fullscap paper before waiting for my dad to fetch me. Heh, I'm dependent on my dad. It's always good to be driven around when you can just sleep in the air-conditioned car.

Chatted quite a lot in the car and came across much food for thoughts.

Baby-pooping machines
I still can't imagine that women were baby-pooping machines in the past. We were practically sows man. Poop! a baby girl. Poop! A baby boy. Poop! again. Twins! Triplets! How convenient. Main leisure activity for men, of course.
I'm so glad I'm born to enjoy democracy(:

I was complaining to my dad about how I felt so deprived of cousins because almost all my classmates were very close to their cousins, relationship so close that they could even be compared to be siblings. Then my dad said I was unlucky because my cousins were old, to the extent of being older than my mum. I'm an old aunty who has 2 nieces already):
nevermind.
Anyway there are little baby-pooping machines nowadays so our future generations will have cousins yay(:


Euthanasia
This is the super hot discussion topic online and in the newspapers. I wondered why, but I asked my dad if he would allow euthanasia to be put on my late granny when she was suffering for the last 20 years of her life. Come to think of it, it was probably a touchy and sensitive topic, but I always spit my mouth out before anything so I hoped it didn't really provoke any painful memories for him.
Oh gosh.

Ahh. I just remembered. He told me that 钱不够用 2 was a very touching show because the old granny in the show reminded him of his mum. Sigh. Why did parents have to die. If only parents and children died together. No sorrow. no remorse. no regrets. nothing. at. all.

Anyway, I hope Euthanasia would be allowed in Singapore. I believe that patients should be given the right to decide if they still wanna live on this earth, and not suffer anymore. It's their life; they choose the path.
I know many people believe that by using euthanasia, they are stripping off that small tiny pathetic percent of hope that a miracle would occur, from the patient. But, miracles wouldn't be called miracles if they happened so often.
I'm realistic. So maybe that's why I don't delude myself.


Cooking
My sis brought back noodles which she whipped up during her home economics lesson and it was kind of delicious, though I hope I can refuse admitting that. I'm destined to be able to cook instant noodles my entire life. Can't even break an egg properly without having shells going in the mixture. Maybe I shall learn how to cook spaghetti. No frying of food, lest my kitchen burns down.
I planned already; if i were to live on my own in the future, my house gonna be small and pathetic, while the computer, living room and teevee gonna be huge. ^^

That's all for today I think. Reflections kind of make me feel good because I feel more peaceful and calm somehow.
I'm weird.



All I need, is a breakthrough


It's going to be 9 soon, 2 hours since I woke up. Woke up very early today because I slept at 9:30 yesterday. Today gonna be a horrid day. I felt slightly feverish and my throat had a stinging pain when I swallowed. My lips have small ulcers and I begin to feel terrible. This stupid cough/sore throat has been going on for 3 weeks already, the longest in my sick period.

Just read Meng's blog and I realised I actually FORGOT IT WAS khoon's birthday! Gosh, being so packed with everything that I can hardly remember what I'm doing actually. Everyday would be so procedural that it seems that I'm a robot.
ahhh
I feel so bad.
Nevermind, I shall type my well wishes for her here anyway! And to think that my smses baoed with about 5 more days to the end of the month plan.

Neo Siew Khoon: hehhe(: You were one of my best friends in primary school and would always be. I bet you're much TALLER than me now, since I shrunk and you seem to be growing non-stop. "the finger" would always appear when I "offended" you somehow right! haha. I'm still scared of tickles I suppose, how lousy. All the best to the recovery of your knee, and may it turn stronger everyday! Take good care of it, if not you'll have regrets like me. (I've turned into an old woman before I even reached 50!)
Goodlucks for basketball and hope that the constant pressure and high expectations from your coach do not diminish the passion you have for basketball(:



I've a rough idea of what I wanna write for the cell analogy but I'm stuck somewhere.
Damn, I'm always STUCK.


That was how I felt when coach just asked us to go home and reflect. It ended up that we only did rear cuts and cuts and read-and-react for the whole of the 3-hour training. It was kind of sad but I suppose I understood what he meant.
):

Ate supposedly nice wantanmee for lunch and chinchow-soyabeanmilk-mix. Bus-ed to Tampines MRT to buy books and ate (AGAIN) at Macs
Jingmei and I reached school super early this morning, if we were to take the bus instead of Jiaqi's car. We reached her house at around 7:15 and found out that she was showering, so we ended up entertaining ourselves in the playground and the chairs by the swimming pool. Aha, I gonna have fun making the animation of her floating around the swimming pool(:

I'm stuck with maths. I still have chinese compo, BP worksheet, Bio analogy, history project and french homework.
DAH

My main computer is down and my dad reformatted EVERYTHING. Shit
Which reminds me of the morning run with the team this morning. The short funny convo with qi.
I was like: My mouth haven't recovered. SHIT.
Then she heard it as: My mouth is covered with shit.
=.=

And there's some mosquitoes attacking me. I feel itchy. AH.


oday's match against TKGS was fine. Just thought we could have probably done better. Coach was lenient and weird actually, although he smashed his fist in the walls at times. Tape does wonders, right rae? heh.
Nicole and Grace came to watch the match. Thanks eh, kind of felt nice. Number 10 from Bedok View's nice haha.

Makan-ed with Rae, Jingmei and Nicole after that at Bedok Center. The laksa was so effing spicy that I began having a runny nose. Rae treated us to milo dino, which was a super rare thing.


We stoned for about half an hour and began camwhoring.
RACHEL CAN'T SMILE.














Ah ha.
I still laugh at Rachel's picture can! AHHH. so cute.

Training's on sat and I gonna go buy books with Crystal. That dumb girl is still laughing over the fire extinguisher incident.
Here's what happened:
I was talking to Jiaqi then I walked a step backwards and jerked onto something which I thought was SOMEBODY'S ASS, so I said sorry sorry, and before I knew it, I was saying sorry to a FIRE EXTINGUISHER.

ah. ):
so malu.

I need to sleep. Printed the bio stuff and gonna chiong them tomorrow. Chiong chem early in the morning too. zzz. I don't want eye bags.


That's love in french aha. I guess it's somewhat better than 3lemon3. But it sounds slightly weird, but nevermind(:

Today was a boring school day except for LA lecture. I seriously LOVE LA now because Mr Ken is such a wonderful engaging teacher. I kind of look forward to it cos it's one of the funnest lessons. I thought the film was slightly hilarious, cos the people flew from the bottom of the stairs to the top and they were like robots jerking around. haha(:

Chemistry and Chinese were plain horror. I think they're the only 2 horrible lessons. Not too badd.
I need to buy assessment books.
Mugged with jacob after school and became his chinese english translator. Then went home and met Cheryl on bus 80 lol.
Careless Rae sprained her ankle just by walking over some small step which she didn't see. Or was it the drain? Anyway it was a horrible one. Talking about injuries, my knee feels as if I sprained it AGAIN but I didn't!
Gosh. Why is my body so gay.

And my computer is fixed(:

Let's hope school will be as fun as possible and full of joy and laughters(:


just came back from match. ohwell, fun. haha.
and I realised our new jersey looks kind of nice and unique :/

I'm kind of feeling sticky now cos I didn't bathe yet. Kept stoning around like some idiot but I gonna go shower soon.
Gonna go read up later and get an early sleep. My poor computer is under repair, ah.

Saturday was walkathon day with Crystal haha. We wanted to touch the ball for a little while at Marine Parade CC but some guys were doing wushu there. I ended up sleeping at the balcony area. The wind was shiok heh.

There's a new ez link card recently. Now Compas Point is booming with people. kind of annoying cos compass point is already noisy enough.
Chinese New Year is like coming so fast!
My birthday's few months later and I gonna feel OLDER.
So many changes.
ahhhh
I feel like working instead of studying right now although I know I'll kind-of regret it.

Sigh. Life's so awful when you know you'll make mistakes.
I gonna go eat an apple now.


was nice. Spoke to alot of people and the sfs were really superb.
French was fine and the new teacher is so wonderful. Her lessons are really interesting, except for the fact that she speaks french her entire lesson, so I can hardly understand what she say. But I gonna put in EXTRAEXTRA effort in french this year damnit. Make my parents shut up. ):
And I'm feeling lousy so this small improvement probably gonna make me happier.
There's some french textbooks that cost lesser than 100 bucks. Geez. Just 2 books and one big hole in my dad's pocket. Heart pain~~

This morning was horrible for Jingmei): cos she got marked late but I wasn't. Well, I realise that her teacher isn't that nice after all. Mrs Tan was super nice, just inquired if I was still unfamiliar with the school and ticked my name.
Here's how we got lost:
Boarded the bus which was packed. I was hoping to get a seat cos I woke up like damn early. Jingmei missed a packed bus so ended up reaching tamp at 7. Bus 15 to Eunos took 45 mins and we overshot one bus stop when I was right that we had to stop. Realised it was 7:50 so we decided to taxi to school, only to realise that the morning assembly had ended when we ran there. I almost got banged down by a car when I braked too slowly. SIGH.
I still haven't figured out how I wanna go to school. HOW.
I want a superman/woman to appear now! ): then he/she can fly me to Dunman High School. Then I can sleep till 7:35. So cool.

Eh, and Jingmei, I didn't mean to elbow you! ahhh. If only I knew you were feeling moody. Then you ended up emo-ing and writing something.
Glad that you were ok after training. heh, suddenly so high. PMS


There gonna be GGG (gang gambling gathering) at Khoon's house(:
Wonderful suggestion.
As always(:
Friends foreverrrrr(:
I'm so glad your are always there whenever I want to chat and the understanding is mutual(: Love the days when we played basketball together and laughed like anything when just a silly thing happened.
AHHHHHH


Gonna go shower to chill abit and think about some serious things. I need to sort out my thoughts and begin planning for the month. Being disorganized ain't gonna do me any good.
The year has started so there's only a day to fool around and perhaps over the chinese new year I can slow down for a while. Other than that, I have to begin really taking my studies seriously. No more days whereby I reach home at 8.30 and finish bathing and dining at 9, doing groupwork till 11 and rushing homework after lessons.
Basketball practices made nights even worse when muscle aches would wake me up in the middle of the night and I will end up with thigh cramps.


I didn't really looked forward to this but neither was I feeling boh-chap. It was neutral I guess, but I can't figure out why I only slept for 2 hours that friday morning. The homecoming was great I suppose, since I couldn't see it from the back of the hall but the effort is commendable(:
I just found the talks slightly littleee bit boring. But, what can you expect anyway?

Watched teammies ball and did 2 sentences of duhougan for 2 hours and bus-ed 158 to Serangoon. Felt like shit on the way back. I wonder if it's some psychology or what, but I felt as if I was going to throw up but the food was just stuck at the oesophagus or something. Stomach felt as if there were insects flying around.
Wanted to take a nap to numb the disgusting nausea (right word? o.o) but the stupid metal box near the window had hinges which caused my head to knock right straight to it when the bus braked. Yawned till I cried. -.-
I think the passengers must have been thinking I was insane.

Saturday was the first training I had since the 2 weeks of potato-couching at home. Just a few sprints and I felt my legs giving way. The muscles were aching and practically screaming for a break. Rest of the training was ok(:
Thankk youuu comint. Ah, you brought the (3kg) knee guard for so many trainings but I didn't use it for like a second! ): ey. I felt bad.

My fat legs can't even squeeze into the knee guard.

Today was fine. Social etiquette workshop was a waste of time because I knew most of the things said. The only thing I learnt was the 45 degree "WOMANLY" standing posture.
Actually, I think all women on earth know about social etiquette and graces just by looking, learning and exposure. However, it's whether they want to make it a point to commit themselves to go through the trouble of being polite and bringing themselves well.

Well, I for one, hate going through trouble.
So I can't walk nicely, sit nicely, and ends up doing everything that I want and like. I know I gonna regret this someday.
ANYWAY, life is full of regrets, so why bother. zzz.

Homeworked with jingmei, jacob and fraser after school. I don't think it was successful but it was better than going home early... I just don't like going home. Sigh. I wish I had a part time job which allowed me to work whenever I wanted.
Had fun chatting about everything. And jacoblim, grass jelly isn't cow dung. Lol.


Which reminds me, I just signed up being a volunteer at the Sengkang Community Library with Meng. She has some M.I.P. or some gay project which requires her to clock 30 hours of CIP involvement within 20 weeks.
I kind of like the idea of being a library volunteer though, cos I can read, shelve books and most importantly, I won't sweat cos it's air-conditioned.
And the library is so smallll that it wouldn't really be a hassle I think.

I shall not be late for tomorrow and let jingmei wait for me cos it will GUFU ta. haha. (: